Mythbusters: The Know It All Edition

I have been told that I am somewhat of a know it all. I will admit to this particular flaw of mine but, I, ever the educational optimist- will use this as a moment to impart some of my wisdom for the betterment of mankind.

Most of these facts were researched for the sole purpose of this article, but let’s just pretend I have an arsenal of impressive trivia and myth debunking experience.

Myth 1: Guy Fawkes was the epitome of an anarchist.

Ask your local aspiring anarchist who their idol is, and chances are they will mention Guy Fawkes.

Guy Fawkes is the inspiration behind these awful masks.

Guy Fawkes is accredited with the cunning plan of almost blowing up Parliament in England in 1605. What a revolutionary, going as far as planning on destabilizing an entire countries government for his beliefs.. What were his beliefs again? Oh, it was that the government was too liberal. England at that point in time was undergoing an egalitarian Protestant revolution, Guy Fawkes planned on blowing up parliament in order to establish Catholic rule and dominion over the country.


Myth 2. Silencers will turn your gunshot into a silent whisper of death.

If you have learned anything from Hollywood, it is that if you want to take out a ruthless drug dealer/dictator/tyrant in public your best bet is to sneak up on him and shoot him with a silencer on your gun. Then you can make your stealthy escape while his bodyguards stand around befuddled yelling, “Did anyone hear where that came from?!” Poppy cock.

An un-silenced gun will register at an average whopping 150 decibels, loud enough to cause deafness with limited exposure. While a silenced weapon will register at 130 decibels, loud enough to cause deafness with repeated exposure and let everyone know exactly what it is you have done and foil your plans.

Myth 3: Scorpions, Sharks and other animals are just waiting to kill you.

Look at how much dying is happening here. Dead.

For whatever reason, animals tend to get misaligned in the media. They are often portrayed as blood thirsty killing machines with an assortment of stingers, venom, teeth and claws that have one purpose; to painfully and excruciatingly end human life. This could not be farther from the truth. Simply put, your odds of dying from a scorpion bite are one in three million. So roughly the same as being killed by lightning.

Keep an eye out for the mythbuster series, there are more myths that will be debunked.